Smart boy...stupid mother

Brock is at the age where I can take a shower while he is in the living room alone. I put on a show for him and give him an activity (blocks, coloring, puzzles, etc), I take Noah into the bathroom with me and leave the bathroom door opened. I have been doing this for about 7 months with out any problems.

This morning I hear Brock yell in an almost panic voice, "mom, mom, mom" and then I hear him running into the bathroom. I pull the shower curtain back to see Brock holding a pair of scissors, he handed them to me and said, "Dangerous", he had a great look of concern on his face, like, "Don't know I could have found these and hurt myself, I better give them to you so that does not happen."

I realized I had left them out from a project I was doing last night. Today could have been a lot different - I thank the Lord for His tender mercies and watching out for my son, I am glad he is so smart, and disappointed that I am so stupid.

Lies

K - So you know how sometime you think you look good - and then you see a picture of yourself and you realize that you do not look good, and even more, people told you you looked good - but now it is obvious they were just lying. I have discovered (and came to the realization) that this is the case with my pregnancies.

Everyone was always like, "you look so cute", "you have this little basketball", "You carry so well" and... I actually believed them. I never took the pregnancy pictures with me standing to the side to show my belly - so I didn't really have proof - then over the last few months I have seen a few snap shots of me during my pregnancies that were horrible - but they were both when I was weeks/days away from delivering - so I justified to myself , "I only looked like that at the end", then today I saw a picture of me at my friends wedding 2 months before I had Brock - and I had to admit the fact - I do not carry my babies well and I am not a cute pregnant person. Just to prove it (against my better judgement), I will post these pictures.

Corinne (Vanderhooft) Myers' wedding in February of 2007 - 2 months before Brock was born - not horrible - but definitely worse than I looked in my head.

Temple Square April of 2007. Just a week before I had Brock. Wow - if you click on this picture (which I don't recommend doing) you will see how fat my face got - I had no idea.

Farm Country, August of 2008, about a week before I had Noah - not the most flattering shirt - but still this would definitely not be described as a "cute pregnant girl".

In my defence I do have (what I think) is a good picture of me in August of 2008 - about 2 weeks before I had Noah. So I hope this is what I look like most of the time - not the above pictures. Please do not leave comments arguing with me - I am not fishing for compliments- just expressing my feelings - thank for listening.

A look back

Today Brock was missing his dad and would not get over it - so I decided to put in our wedding video so he could see Jason. It worked and in the mean time I got to watch our wedding video - which I have not done for a few years. I was shocked at how young we looked. I know some people are laughing (or rolling their eyes) right now because A)we are still young and B)EVERYONE told us we were too young. But we really looked so young - it got me reflecting on the last 8 years (how long we have been together) and what I thought about everything.

Jason and I fell in love young and we fell in love fast. We were 16 and I knew within a few months of dating him that I wanted to marry him (we started dating end of July '01 and I remember wanting to marry him in October of '01). We dated all through High School and are each others first and only kiss and first and only boyfriend/girlfriend. Many people told us that we would regret not dating other people in high school, falling in love so young, getting married so young, having kids so young, etc. But today I thought about it and I am happy to report that I don't regret any of it, it was right for us and I could never be happier - if anything knowing how happy we are I wish we would have skipped everything and gone right to marriage and kids.

The further Jason and I have gotten in our relationship the better things have gotten. People say that marriage is hard, and for us marriage is easy - dating, now that was hard. We just didn't know how to casually date - we just wanted to be married from day one, and for 16 year olds that causes a lot of problems (I am not talking about sex - in case any of you were thinking that) - but being married just came naturally to us. Once we had kids I was worried that things would come between us (everyone warned me of this), but our marriage was AWESOME after we had Brock - we truly started becoming one - everything just, "clicked" - and now with Noah, same thing. I cannot wait to see what the future has in store for us.

Backing up a little - people said we would regret our decisions, and while I do not regret them, I will say, after pondering the issue, there are a few things I do regret.

• I regret letting Jason off the hook too soon. Because we were "in love" I didn't make him "woo" and pursue me as much as I should have. When we first started dating I had a job and he didn't so I paid for most of our dates... what?? And he never asked me to a dance in a fun/cute way because he said he did not have to impress me. I did not think it was a big deal because we were "above" that - hooey. Someone should have told me that if I really thought I was going to marry him than I should make sure that he spends ALL his money on me now - because we will be saving it for the rest of our lives.
• I regret losing contact with my girl friends - there was a lot more that had to do with this than Jason - but he definitely made it easier. Many of you read my blog and know who you are - I love you and cherish our friendship more than you will ever know.
• I regret being so "responsible" at the beginning of our marriage and not taking a honeymoon - we said we would take it that summer - we still have never taken it. Money always seems too tight - and now it is too complicated with kids. We have never really been on a vacation together - this is probably my biggest regret - because now it will never be easy and care-free. Looking back, what would a few thousand dollars less really have done to us? (Actually we were so poor we really didn't have it - but I think we could have come up with it.)

Looking back today I really realized we have accomplished a lot in the last 4 years. We were married very young, yet despite the doubts, in 4 years we both finished college, never lived with in-laws or family, never took any money from family, bought a car, had 2 kids, and have no debt or payments of any kind. I think we have done all right - we have paid our tithing and kept God's commandments and try hard to serve him in our ward.  He is the reason our life is so good.

URRG...

I feel like almost every other post this winter has been about my children's sicknesses - but here is another one! I feel like we have been sick since November - last week I took Noah to the doctors and it marked the 18 time I have gone to the doctor since Noah was born! (Well 18 co-pays - sometimes I took them both in at the same time). The last two weeks we have had 3 more ear infections and strep throat. And for the record I am not a crazy mom that takes my kids to the doctors all the time and always worries. Last winter we did not go to the doctors once! Brock finished his medicine for an ear infection 2 days ago and today he had his finger in his ear and ways saying "ear hurt" - I almost cried. It hurts Noah to sleep or breastfeed - I am going on almost 5 days without more than 2 hours of sleep, and I have to pump and them bottle feed him at every feeding. So sorry to all those who need a call back (you know who you are :) I plan on doing it this week.

Despite the sicknesses things have been relatively good. Brock wasn't actually sick at the beginning of the week - so we got to enjoy the nice weather - Jason's mom came by almost everyday and took Brock to the duck pond - which was great because I hated taking Noah out because he was feeling so miserable.

It is so fun having Noah get bigger - They are starting to play together - I miss my baby terribly - but since my nights are still bad - I still kind of feel like I have one.

Brock new favorite thing is to string beads and make necklaces. He is getting really good at it - and it creates a great opportunity to talk about sorting and patterns. I love that Brock is getting bigger and more "preschoolish" because I feel like I can actually USE my education (my degree is in Early Childhood Education) - I have turned our house into a mini preschool.

Apartment

Anyone need (or know of anyone) who needs a 2 bedroom apartment in Provo by the Y? Preferably with kids. (It's not mine - in case anyone was excited for me because they thought we were moving - because we are not!!!)

Saint George

Karli and I took our kids to Saint George last week for some fun in the sun! We did this twice last year and it was awesome - so we did it again this year. Last year we had another mom and her kids on the trips - but last minute her kids got sick - so it was just the 6 of us (plus Karli's little sister and her friend - they were a HUGE help). Last year I was pregnant with Noah and remember being overwhelmed at the thought of having another baby so close to Brock (no one knew I was pregnant - we were not telling people yet) - it wasn't as hard as I thought it would be. Both my kids are really great - I can't complain.

All the pictures are from Snow Canyon.
Playing in the sand dunes. Noah loved the feel of the sand in his toes and hands - he would laugh when he tried to pick it up and couldn't. Brock definitely has to warm up to stuff like this - when we do something new he usually just sits there for 15 or so minutes and just watches everyone else - Noah just dives right in.

Not a great shot - but I liked the view of the sky - plus who can turn down a sandy cookie? Not Brock!

I think we might be putting a sand box on our balcony this summer - he really liked digging.

Payton really likes babies - and he is really cute with Noah. Luckily Noah does not mind the attention - he is used to Brock being ALL over him. Here Payton is trying to bury Noah's feet.

The funny part about this trip is it really shows the difference between your first child and your second child. I counted and on the first trip to Saint George last year I took 48 pictures in 3 days - and all of them were just of Brock by himself or with me, on the second trip I took 30 pictures - again, all just of Brock or with me, and on this trip I took 12 pictures - pretty much all with other kids - one of Brock by himself - none with just Noah and none with me and the kids. (First trip - here, here, and here. second trip - here.) Funny how things change - Don't feel too bad for Noah though - he actually has more pictures to date than Brock did at his age (mostly thanks to all the newborn photo shoots he got).

Dishes

So over the weekend me and the boys went to St. George with Karli and her kids (pictures to come). I spoke with Jason on Saturday night and he proudly told me that he "did the dishes". I came home to a dirty pan in the sink and a pile of dirty dishes on the counter. I rolled my eyes.

That night after Brock went to bed this was our conversation:

me: "I am going to feed Noah, while I do that, how about you go in and do the dishes."
J: "I did the dishes."
me: "No you didn't, doing the dishes means there are no dirty dishes on the counter and there are no dirty pans in the sink - STACKING dishes does not count as DOING them!"
J: "fine"

He proceeds to do the dishes. He is done and I go into the kitchen and he had RINSED out the pan and set it next to the sink for me to wash.

me: "Are you kidding me - DO THE DISHES!"
J: "I did the dishes."
Me: "Let me reiterate, doing the dishes means there are no dirty dishes on the counter and there are no dirty pans in the sink. When I go on vacation I leave the house clean so I can come home to a clean house - seriously - wash the pan!"
J: "You are unbelievable."

Where-upon he washed the pan

Most of this conversation was in sarcasm - but seriously - what is this boy thinking?! At first I wasn't going to make a big deal about it - after all he really thought that he was being a great husband by doing the dishes - but then I thought - after 4 years of marriage and 2 kids - he needs to know. I am told he gets his "stacking dishes is the same as washing dishes" attitude from his father.

Draper Open House

We took the boys to the Draper Temple open house today. The above picture does not do the event justice - the boys were great. Noah was happy the whole time and Brock was relatively good. He does not have the "whisper" thing down very well - and felt the need to point at every picture of Jesus and say "Jesus" and "Angel" if there were pictures of angels. But how can a mother complain about that?!?

Brock's fabulous cheesy smile whenever he sees a camera.

When Brock was Noah's age Jason was home all the time - so we have lots of pictures of them together - not so with Noah - so we have to make an effort to get them - oh the pains in the life of a second child. (I should know.) :)