Homecoming!

All three of my kids went to homecoming stag this year.  It was pretty cute.

Megan went with a group of kids.  At the last minute it ended up being an even number of girls and boys, but they really weren't paired off in any way.  They had a fun time.

The girls all got the same dress but different colors.  Harry Potter colors! 

This is Megan's best friend, Kaitlyn.  They are soul mates!  

 

Doesn't she look beautiful?!

Megan and I had a big miscommunication and got into one of our first/real mom and teenage daughter fights on the way to taking her to her friends house to get ready.  Not one of my proudest parenting moments.  Basically having a 14 year old girl go to homecoming with friends is a weird middle zone.  How much do I pay for a dress?  Is going with a date just as exciting as going with out a date? (good arguments on both sides) She can't go with a date, so is it JUST as special, but if she were 17, then it isn't as special because she chose not to go with a date (assuming she chose not too).  Anyways, I wasn't sure.  She said she wanted to got get ready at her friends house at 3, then at that friends house all the other kids and parents were coming over at 5 to take pictures and then they were eating dinner at Kaitlyn's and going straight to the dance.  I was a little heart broken because that meant that I wasn't helping her get ready, and her dad and siblings wouldn't see her in her dress.  But since she is 14, does that matter?  So I said, "ok" and didn't voice my concerns.  This was also because Megan and I were having constant frustrations with each other because she felt like I was often not letting her carry out her plans or ruining her plans or something like that.  So I erred on the side of "ok".  So I took Dane and Eve to a park after lunch and told Megan I would be home in time to take her to Kaitlyn's house.  I got home in time to take her, and she was visibly upset with me.  She got in the car and eventually we came to discover that she was hurt that I wasn't home to help her get ready and she had to put her make up on (eye liner and stuff that she has never worn before) and curl her hair all by herself and she felt like I didn't care.  What?????  Why was she curling her hair and putting makeup on at our house?  Apparently we had different definitions of "Getting ready at Kaitlyn's house" and "Home in time to take you to Kaitlyn's.  I was so sad that not only did I miss the chance to help my first daughter to go to her first dance, and also that in my attempts to NOT upset her by letting her do her own thing and not having to change her plans to meet my expectations - I let her down and she was feeling sad and lonely and eventually frustrated with me.

Later that night the boys got ready and were about to head to the dance (it was just at the high school) but I made them go outside to take pictures.  I had just hung these lights in the backyard and I thought it would be a great place to take the pictures.  They looked better on my phone when I was taking them.  I wish I knew enough about the phone camera to learn how to make the lights look normal/good, I am sure a simple youtube video would show me.

Anyways, here are my handsome boys.  They kill me.  I just adore them.  

Although Noah decided to start having this crooked smile.  I thought he wasn't doing it on purpose so I didn't say anything for a few months, then I found out he was doing it on purpose.  haha

Brothers!!!  I love their style and their suits.

And... thank heavens for daughters.  I got texts of pictures during the dance!  It was thrilling.  

She even got her brothers to do selfies!

They had roller skating

 

Ice Cream

Jason eats ice cream pretty much every day.  He doesn't love it, because he also works out every day and he recognizes he is likely canceling that out.  But I love it.  I find it endearing.  I have always known my grandpa had a bowl of ice cream every night.  So... It fills me with warmth when Jason does.  

Others love it to because he shares.

 

Starting off school sick

This post should have gone right after my "first day of school" post.  I can't remember all of the details now (6 months later) but a few of my kids were sick the first day of school, and it only escalated from there.  On the first 2 or 3 weeks of school I never had a day where all 6 kids were in school, I always had a kid home AND some days I had multiple kids home, many days I would pick kid up from school who tried to go or take kids late who just needed to sleep in and take a good hot shower.  Between that and the doctor appointments (we ended up with a few strep, a few ear infections, a few sinus infections) my "all my kids in school 12 hours a week" projects were non existent.  I think it was intentional.  A good reminder from Heavenly Father to not get ahead of myself and loose sight of my real job.  I am here to mother, not to get my to-do list done.  But sometimes I wonder... who is going to get all those things done?  

I tried my best to give the teenagers a sense of control, knowledge, and independence in this.  I wanted them to be in charge of how they got better and what lengths they wanted to go to.  So I made a charcutier board of wellness and it stayed on our counter for a few weeks, along with an info sheet on how to use it.

update: 6 months into the school year not much has changed.  I have gotten several emails about each one of my kids having missed "too much school", and we haven't even missed for a vacation or anything.  It is rare for me to go a whole week without 1 or 2 kids home sick.  Back in 2009 I remember vividly (I think there is a post) that I counted up that from December to April I paid 21 copays between BROCK AND NOAH! to take them to the doctor.  And I am not a crazy paranoid mom - I put it off as long as I can.  We had everything that year, hand foot and mouth, strep, rosiola, several infections, both had croup twice.  crazy.

 

Benson Boone!

(Posted on Facebook back in September, when we went.)

Maddie and I went to the Besnon Boone concert at Red Rocks. It was amazing. We went with my good friend, Megan Rothy. She is a true minister (and not even my ministering sister). Ministering to me and loving me these days looks like helping my children or helping me mother - especially my teens (also either making or proving yummy food to me). Months ago Maddie asked to go to the concert, we went to buy tickets and it was going to be 750.00 for both of us, for the worst seats. I told her sorry, we just couldn’t. She cried. I cried. I hated it. She hated it. I checked back a few more times but prices were still high. I reconciled myself by acknowledging that it is good for her to not get everything she wants and to deal with disappointment. Plus, school started and my to-do list grew and I just didn’t have the time or energy to keep checking, and I just forgot about it.

1 week before the concert Megan called. She was at the park with me the day I told Maddie no. She listened to my heart break. She had remembered. She had kept watch. Even though she had 3 young kids, she had the bandwidth I didn’t have. She called to say she found tickets, good seats!, for 130. We could do that!! Not only did she look for ticket prices to drop and tell me about it, she purchased the tickets, figured out parking, what time we needed to leave, and drove us, and even scanned us in to the ticket agent. She is a good 10 years younger than me and she was MY mom that night. I would not have done it. I could not have done it. I just know I couldn’t have prioritized that in the same week of homecoming, spirit week, senior pictures, drivers license test, parent teacher conference, primary program, “backstage” week, dentist appointments, planning for the cruise we go on in 2 weeks, and then all the NORMAL stuff. She is my hero. I felt so seen and loved. Thank you! I pray I have been that to someone in the past. And that one day, I can be that for someone else. I have tried, and will keep trying. But today I am so grateful for letting someone do it for me.

Maddie was fun to! It was a great night to just do something fun, something in her world. One of the best parts was getting ready and picking out outfits together. Jason and the boys were so confused about why we wanted to match the “vibe”. I feel like myself again having teenage girls in the house. I hadn't been to a concert since my sophmore year of high school. I thought I didn't care about them anymore and I was a "different person". Turns out I was just poor, and did have anyone in my life who helped me go or would go with me. I had so much fun. I think it was the funnest night I have had in YEARS - like real fun, not "mom fun" haha.

**Above was written back in September after we went. This is real time, in February. A Benson Boone song came on the radio the other day while I was driving Maddie to school. All the feelings came rushing back. I told her I was SO GLAD we went. SO GLAD. I want to go to more concerts.