Utah: The Herberts

Because we went on an extra long and extra expensive vacation at the beginning of the summer we didn't go on our other "usual" vacations which included a big Utah summer trip.  However, Noah and Megan ended up signing up to go to FSY at BYU the last week of summer, so I had to drive them out there and back.  Obviously I took Dane and Eve with me and Maddie and Brock got the choice.  Brock had soccer camp, so he stayed with Jason, but Maddie decided to come.

We stopped at the Herbert's first and spent Friday night and Saturday with them.

The evening we got there we went to an awesome park in Spanish Fork we had never been to before.  It had a great splash pad and all sorts of cool things.

I didn't take a picture - but Maddie and Noah started doing box jumps onto the benches and equipment.  It turned into quite a "thing" and I was so impressed with how high both of them could box jump.  Turns out Eve can box jump pretty high also.

It was one of those perfect summer evenings.

We also stopped by a bridge that a friend told us we could jump off of.  Maddie thought she might want to try.  But when we got there there was this sign saying you can't jump off of it, so instead we sat and watched a bunch of other teenagers jump off of it.  haha

Then we had ice cream in grandma's backyard.

Such a perfect evening in a perfect place.  Debby's backyard on a summer evening is one of my favorite places.

The next day Dane and Eve got to help grandpa mow the lawn.

I desperately want to give them as much time with their Herbert grandparents as possible.  They are such wonderful grandparents and I want Dane and Eve to have solid memories of them.

Grandma Herbert was in 100% work mode.  I am not sure if the grandkids had ever really seen her like this.  I think it will be one of those core memories that they will always remember about her.   At this point she had been working for 9 months, almost completely by herself, to get  their house ready to sell.  We showed up just 3 days before it was supposed to go on the market and she was way behind schedule.  She had been clearing out and getting rid of almost 55 years of stuff, finishing their basement, and doing so many house projects.  When we walked in it was clear she needed help.  I was so proud of Noah, he stepped up and helped (the girls helped too, but Noah did a lot more because grandma asked a lot more of him).  Noah always steps up and helps but I was proud because this was different.  Grandma is hard to help and I don't think he had ever really seen her like this.  And to be fair she isn't used to help, so when you get help it can be hard to let go of control.  He handled it really well.

For many reasons it was a pretty traumatic experience.  Debby and Randy have been parents to me since I was 16.  I wanted to help.  I wanted to stay, I wanted to call her sons to fly in and take over, I wanted things to go well for her.  I did all I could do.

Maddie, Dane, Eve, and I went swimming on Saturday afternoon.  I had arranged for Mike Ulrich, a relator and friend, to come to Debby's to see her house, so I left them at the pool and didn't get pictures of Dane going down the huge slide (and I also didn't get to see him do it) technically he was too short, but I guess Maddie figured out a way to slide it by one of the life guards.  I guess that is the joy of older, teenage sisters.

 

Utah: Daniel and Angie's and the Baptism

Earlier in the summer Daniel and Angie’s kids stayed at our house a few days and since then Dane and Eve have wanted to sleep over at their house. So I took them over one evening and dropped them off. Dane was a little nervous but he eventually warmed up.

Daniel and Angie are the cutest! They have turned their little suburban backyard into a little homestead I have never seen someone do so much with a little backyard. They have an amazing garden with everything you could imagine, including corn. And they have chickens and they put a run throughout the garden so they can run around. Daniel built all of these things and put drippers, and boxes, and all other things they want. I felt so proud of my little brother. I knew he was handy and willing, but he was always my little brother, but I am so impressed of the man he has become.

These are pictures Daniel and Angie sent me, they had a blast and when I went and picked them up the next day they did not want to come home with me.

Dane slept with Ben and Eve slept with the girls.

After I dropped Dane and Eve off I went over to Katie's house.  We sat in her living room and talked until 4 in the morning!  It was so good and so needed.  It was basically a therapy session.  Audrey was with us as well, but she mostly listened.  We talked about things we should have talked about 20 years ago.  It was awesome!

On Saturday morning I went back down to Provo to pick Megan and Noah up from FSY.  I loved hearing about their experiences and all the things they learned.  When we got back to Sandy I kept driving around instead of going back to grandma's because I wanted them to keep talking.  We even stopped by a garage sale and got some awesome stuff (an amazing blanket for Megan for like 5 dollars).

Then we went to Mikey's baptism.  This was one of my "compensatory blessings" the Lord gave me last year (he gave me MANY).  Years ago Jason and I decided we would make sure someone in our family went out our nieces and nephews baptisms.  But we also decided we wouldn't take an extra trip out to Utah this year.  Mikey's baptism happened to be the same day Megan and Noah needed to be picked up from FSY.  So we went to his baptism before heading home.

It was so great, they had lunch at the pavilion behind the church - we stayed for a hot minute while we changed into more comfy clothes and then we got in the car for a long, late drive home.  Because we were up in Bountiful we decided to take 80 home.  We have never taken 80 home.  It was actually kind of nice to do something different.  Noah ended up driving us home most of the way, which was great because then he couldn't sleep and we got to talk.  We also stopped at Little America for ice cream cones - which is always a win.  

Summer Temple Trips

It was our worst summer for temple trips.  So many different factors collided into this summer that even building really strong habits and foundations over the last 4 summers it all crumbled!  haha.  From not having a "built in" babysitter (second summer for that) AND Dane and Eve not napping (first summer of that) we just couldn't do our usual 1:00.  Then Megan, Brock and Noah all work and there was almost never a consistent time that they could all go.  And Jason working in office 4 days a week - so he would take his car to work (duh) and then Brock and I shared the van at home and the other three had busy lives and needed rides places and Dane and Eve's summer fun.... it was just too hard.  I had hoped that Brock could just take over and take the car and do it - but, again, all the factors got to us, but he did do that once or twice.  And NOW (January of 2025) Noah is driving so he has been able and willing to drive for some temple trips, so that has been nice.

But we made it a few times, I don't take pictures every time we go, but here is one.  

One day Dane made a temple scene with Legos and wanted a picture.  

 

Family Swimming Night

Back to summer.  I have a vision, a vision I formed like 3 or 4 years ago.  I have since learned that my vision wasn't quite reality, although I am still not sure why.  Also, just because my vision is not reality now, doesn't mean it wont be later - I have a long mothering life left.   

My vision:  During the summer on Friday afternoons Dane, Eve, and I would go swimming at our neighborhood pool (walking distance from our house and the kids school).  I would have pizza at the pool and we would stay there all evening.  The teenagers and Jason would stop by for dinner, come and go with friends, maybe swim, maybe read, do something else at the rec center (work out, play tennis, etc), chat and talk about their plans for the weekend.  I would have pizza for all of their friends.  Maybe even their friends would come and look forward to it as well.  Very casual, very low expectations.  The three of us would just be there from like 3-7 and you could know that you could come and go anytime between then to get dinner, relax, chat, and check in.  Doesnt that sound dreamy?  And totally possible!  I hope that next summer it can be - or maybe a few summers after that.  

Anyways I told Jason and the teens about my vision, they kind of laughed at me, and I asked if we could do it ONE time, and they all agreed.  They gave it their best - but it was hard for most of them.  They asked questions like, "what am I supposed to do?"  "why am I here?", "Can I leave now?"  "Have I been here long enough?"  I don't think any of them swam, nobody brought friends, nobody "came and went", they all came when I brought Dane and Eve and left the moment I said, "you guys can leave if you want".    I think Jason was the most confused - you can see it in his face.  But I give them all an A for effort.  They humor me and my plans all the time and I love them for it.  

Dane and Eve did convince Jason and Brock to get in towards the end and throw them around.  They had so much fun.  The night was a win.

 

The break continues

I have spent almost every waking-available free minute this last week of break resetting our home.  It feels like I am just moving stuff around.  As I do it I have thought a lot about if it is worth it.  I have learned a lot of things as I have done it.  But the answer to a lot of it is, "yes", which was surprising.  I expected my answer to be to simplify, so I can spend less time setting up, maintaining, and cleaning.  There is a line, and there are things I want to simplify.  But He taught me my role.  I am a creator.  I am creating.  I am creating moments.  Emotions.  Memories.  Links.  I will hardly ever know fruit that was created or seeds that were planted in my childrens hearts, minds, souls.  But I have faith in a living God and he will concentrate my efforts.

While I was putting away Christmas Dane and Eve built a Christmas village.

 

In the Herbert household a wintery forest with snow covered pine trees must have a lamp post hidden among the trees.  Dane and Eve didn't know why, I think they might find out this year.

Then on Monday I was trying to come up with a plan to do something fun.  Megan and Noah had tech, so they were out.  Brock and Maddie are always looking for something fun to do and are always up for a good time.  I came up with a plan for Brock to take Maddie, Dane, and Eve to a place we have never been before called, "Lava Island".  Brock called his friends and invited them.  Dane and Eve felt SO PRIVLAGED to be able to go with Brock and his friends.  It was all working out so great!  It was 30 minutes away, so I was going to have 3 hours or more to finish getting house stuff done AND everyone was having a great time TOGETHER - it was a win, win.  Then my phone rang.  With out going into TOO much detail they wouldn't let them in because they didn't have an adult with them (Brock is 2 1/2 months away from being 18 - AND everywhere "says" that, but never has anyone cared before).  It was my fault, so I told them I would drive out there and "get them in".  There goes my plans for the day - but I didn't care too much, my main objective was for my kids to have a good day, so driving out there to "get them in", while annoying, was worth it.  Then, while I was like 10 minuets away Maddie got up the courage to ask another mom who was just coming in to "get them in" (something I had recommended they do before I left the house but it was too embarrassing).  She asked and the mom said "yes".  She called and we  traded information.  I was so proud.  What a win!  They figured it out, they pushed themselves out side of comfort zones, they learned there are good people who are willing to help, they learned that they can and should help other people, and we can problem solve (they wanted to just give up and come home).   However, they did not take any pictures (like I asked them to), so I took these when they came home.  Maddie doesn't love having her picture taken - so she tries to be funny.  

I put our books back out after taking down christmas stuff and I decided to decorate by color this time.  Kind of fun.