Another journalish post

Today was a day full of emotions.  Our good friends, the Tobler's, blessed their baby girl today down in Provo.  It was so special to be with them. They had their first child about a year and a half ago, but lost him due to cord complications, seeing them with their new little girl has been so wonderful.  They live in the apartment complex where we used to live, and attend the married student ward that we attended.  We went back to our old chapel.  Jason's parents live in Mapleton and it was nap time so we decided to take the kids there first and nap them, then Jason and I just went to the blessing by ourselves. 

It was surreal.  We sat there - in a sacrament meeting, with no kids, pregnant, surrounded by newly weds, students, and first time parents.  I really didn't feel any different from them.  I started to think of my time there - how it seems like just 2 seconds ago, I sat with Jason in the same pews being pregnant with Brock.  Now we sat there, pregnant with our fourth!  How did we get here?  I don't know quite what I am trying to say... I hope you are maybe reading between the lines and feeling what I am trying to convey.  It is amazing how the Lord leads you and directs your path when you let him.  His plans for us are far greater that the plans we have for ourselves.  Our path has rarely been clear, and has taken many turns, but the consistency is that we have always known that He is there and that our choices regarding our family have been right.  Part of me wished that I could have gone right back to us at 22, sitting in that pew, awaiting the arrival of our first child, both of us studying for finals.  I would not have done anything different - it was just a good time in our life.  One I will always cherish.

After the blessing I went to a viewing.  My friends that I worked with back in my working days (before I had Brock) lost their 2 year old son last week.  His death was sudden and unexpected.  I worked with Brooke and Brek - Brooke and I were both expecting our first sons together and took maternity leave at the same time.  They have three sons (all about the same age as my three).  I, of course, could not help but put myself in their shoes and think about losing my little Noah.  I could barely keep myself together to go through the line and express my love to them.  They are strong, good people...things like this are hard to understand.  I expected to stay at the viewing most of the night but I decided to hurry home to see my babies before they went to bed.  I am glad I did.