Back to the temple

Facebook Post:

July 27, 2021

Today is the day. I am humbled, excited, and grateful to go back to the House of the Lord today.

That Facebook post scarcely reflected how I felt.  On one hand I can say that my heart was dying to get to the temple.  But on the other hand I can rightly say... not as much as I thought.  He sustained me during this pandemic.  Before the pandemic i couldn't go 3 weeks without being drawn back to the temple.  I was compelled to go.  I could feel it, I could feel Him calling me there.  When it closed I assumed it would feel like I was starving or thirsting for the temple.  But it didn't feel like that.  I felt full.  I didn't need it.  I had my covenants.  I had the Holy Ghost.  I did family history work.  I could tell He was compensating for the temples not being open.  I went weeks, then months, then over a year and I never felt like I needed the temple.   But as the days drew closer to it being open I was increasingly excited.  My first ordinance was sealings.  It was beautiful.  Immediately I was reminded I was in the Lord's house.  He orchestrated a sacred miracle with a Peruvian family and the sealing being an old Peruvian mission and temple president.  Beautiful.

Then things got a little rough.  You have to make appointments to go.  I could never keep my appointments.  It is not the phase of my life for appointments.  I can't predict how the next 10 minutes are going to go, or tomorrow afternoon, let alone next week.  I reschedule Doctor appointments and dentist appointments at least 2 or 3 times before we actually go.  With 7 people always relying on my stars have to align for me to leave the house for 2 or 3 hours.  And the truth is, stars align quite often, it just isn't predictable.  That is how I went to the temple before.  I got a spare hour or 2 and would just immediately go.  But now I couldn't.  Week after week went my and I would cancel my appointment and reschedule.  It was frustrating.  And my "full cup"?... gone.  He was no longer sustaining me.  That "light" I was walking in all the time was no longer just in my home, He now required me to go to the temple to get that light.  Gladly!  I have figured it out.  I have gone every week for about 2 months.  I am keeping my appointments.  I pray for the day I can go on a whim.  

Also I take teenagers once a month.  It is my favorite.  I don't always get to take a picture (cuz sometimes I don't always want to be THAT mom).  I am overwhelmingly grateful for my boys.  They love the temple.  They take every opportunity to go.  And I mean every opportunity.  Even when it is really inconvenient or if they already went that week.  If someone has an open ticket and offer it up they always take it. I would think they would both hate doing baptisms.  Brock hates getting in the water and Noah hates getting church clothes on (and you have to do it twice in a short amount of time) but so far neither has complained.  Love them!