Steve's soccer ball

Steve Kapfer had a soccer ball that he used to kick around the parking lot. Brock loved to watch him kick it up against the shed doors - as soon as Brock could kick a ball he took it right out to the parking lot and kicked it up against the shed doors just like Steve.

Steve just left the soccer ball outside in the parking lot (if you can't tell), and I was always amazed that it was never stolen nor did it ever roll away. When the Kapfer's moved almost a year ago (has it been that long? wow) Steve left it. About a week after they moved the ball disappeared, I looked everywhere for it. I thought it was so strange that for almost 3 years it never got lost, and then as soon as the Kapfer's moved - the ball was gone. I actually intended on blogging about how sad I was that the ball was gone - the last emblem of the Kapfers. Then a few week's ago the ball reappeared - out of no where. We came down into the parking lot one morning - and there it was, just sitting at the bottom of the stairs. Brock's eyes lit up as he went and kicked it up against the shed doors.

I love having the ball back - it makes me feel like the Kapfers are still right next door. I still find little girl barrettes and bows ("pretties") in my couch cushions and occasionally I come across a toy baby bottle or some other sort of pink toy. It seems like just yesterday I had those precious girls in our living room jumping on the couches and getting out all of our toys. Sometimes I wonder if Brock remembers them - but I haven't asked yet, in case he does -because if he went over and knocked on their door I would cry. (confession - I am crying right now just thinking about it.)

Noah's basket of balls

I have been meaning to blog about this for months. Ever since Noah could sit up his favorite thing to do is to sit by the basket of balls and pick each ball out one by one and play with each ball. He would seriously sit there for hours if I let him and just slowly play with each ball. He is very meticulous and controlled in his play. He likes balls just as much as Brock did/does - but in a very different way. Brock was throwing balls and hitting balls by 8 months - Noah just likes to hold them, roll them, and shake them - he has yet to figure out how to throw them.

I am really glad I got this picture when I did - Noah is crawling all over the place now and doesn't really do this as much - I didn't realize how sad it would make me. He has really grown up in the last week.

In honor of my father

It took only a few months into marriage when I realized that most (if not all) of my preconceived notions of what a father/husband/man is or supposed to do came from what my father did. I never really realized what a profound influence he had on me until I started my own family. During this last Fathers Day weekend I have been thinking about my dad and I thought I would share with all of you what a terrific father he was and is.

• He works so hard for our family. I think this would be number one on most peoples list about their fathers - as well it should be, they are supposed to be the providers... right? Well, when it comes to my dad I think it is extra true. When I was growing up my dad worked so hard and sacrificed so much to make sure that we were taken care of - and more importantly, to make sure my mom was home with us. He was working 60, 80, even 90 hour weeks while he was also getting his MBA. For the last 10 years or so my dad has been traveling a lot for work - I never realized what I sacrifice that is until I had to travel a few times for my job - it is exhausting. For the last few years my dad has had some hard times at his company, he is unhappy with his position and with the way the company is being run, nor is he getting the credit he deserves. My level of respect rose dramatically when I considered the fact that my dad maybe didn't like his job, or that it was hard, but he did it because that is what he was supposed to do - I had never considered this growing up.
• He always did what was best for the future. This kind of goes with the category above - but I wanted to put it in it's own because I think it is so great. Soon after my parents got married my mom got pregnant, and then she got pregnant soon after that, and again soon after that. My dad was still in college getting his bachelors, but was also working. In a few years he was a manager at Smiths grocery store, he had great benefits and was making really good money. I think it is really tempting for many young fathers to feel the pressures of having to provide for their new family and to "temporarily" put their education on hold to hurry and make some money, especially when they have a good job. I think my dad could have easily done this and provided great for us for several years - but he didn't. He finished his bachelors and went on to get an MBA. Looking back it would have been almost catastrophic, both financially and emotionally, on the family if he would have given up on his education and just stayed with his seemingly "good job". To me this says a lot about my dad's character and priorities.
• My dad always took time for us. As previously mentioned my dad was very busy while I was growing up - so obviously he wasn't home much - but when he was he always took time for us. My dad got home from work/school and he was in dad mode. I have fond memories of gardening or playing out in the backyard with my dad. I remember that Wednesday's were my dad's day-off and I knew we would play all day. He took me camping, fishing, and hiking. We used to go hiking - just me and him. He always came on our family vacations to Flaming Gorge or to the cabin and always new everything about the outdoors. Looking back I realize how much he had to prioritize our camping to be able to come every year with his busy schedule. Not only all that, but he coached my softball team every year and also many of my brothers and sisters sports. He came to almost every game and many of the practices just to watch and support. He took us all snow skiing several times every winter and fishing in the summers. When I was in the hospital as a child I remember his coming and having lunch with me almost every day. I never remember him really taking time for himself when he got home at nights or on the weekend. Everything was for the family.
• I could always go to my dad for help. My dad and I always seemed to have a special bond - different from my other sisters. I have always felt like I could talk to him. This became extra true and important while I was dating and deciding to marry Jason. It was quite the traumatic experience with the family and there was a lot of drama and hurt feelings. My dad was the only one that I felt understood me, trusted me, and supported me. I will ALWAYS remember the way he treated me and I appreciate it so much. I also always knew I could go to him for gospel help. I remember when I was 16 I was reading the Book of Mormon for the first time and I didn't understand some of the Isaiah chapters in Second Nephi (let's be honest...who does?), the first person that came to my mind to ask was my dad. I remember sitting down with him and going over the chapters. I always knew that my dad served a great mission and always put the Lord first. When Jason and I were very first dating he sat in on one of our family home evenings - my dad was discussing the D&C - mostly section 1. I wasn't really paying attention - I was mostly just trying to get Jason's attention. After it was over Jason told me that I should have listened to my dad because he was saying some great stuff. My dad has always had a strong spirit about him.
• He is such a great grandpa. I really can't over emphasize this enough. Watching my dad with Brock has been one of the greatest blessings. It has opened up a whole new side of my dad that I never saw or recognized before. He is always wanting to play with Brock and even just be around him. He is always wanting Brock to "help him out in the garden" or "go play with the dog together" or "go run an errand with him." If my dad is leaving the house he always says, "Brock come with me." I remember when Brock was like 1 and I was over there feeding him baby food and my dad asked if he could feed him. What? Sure. I did not think my dad would have ever asked that. He is SO FUN with the grand children and really just puts them first as soon as they come over to the house. They all know they can find Grandpa down stairs in his office and that he will give them candy.

Thank you dad for being so great and selfless, you always put the family first, and we never really appreciated it. I love you and hope you had a great fathers day.

Ghetto? no

Q: Is it ghetto to make your oldest child ride in the basket of your stroller instead of buying a double stroller?
A: Not when he loves it

The Provo temple has BEAUTIFUL pink roses EVERYWHERE right now. These pictures do not show the half of it, it is so stunning. For you in Provo - you should head up there - it is so beautiful. So beautiful that Brock sat down on the grass and asked me to take a picture of him with the flowers... I am not kidding.

Also, while we were up there we saw a lot of MTC missionaries coming out of the temple - he talked to a few of them. For the next few days he would get his shoes on and grab the diaper bag and tell me good-bye, when I asked him where he was going he would say, "on a mission for Jesus." haha

Just to talk

When I was in Jr High and High School there was a Snow Shack up the street from my house. This was the gathering place for teenagers during the summer months. This was largely before everyone had cell phones - so if you wanted to find your friends, just chat, or hook up with some new friends, you just had to head up to the Snow Shack and in a few minutes you were bound to find what you were looking for.

The adult equivalent is obviously a bar or a coffee shop. But where do you go if you are Mormon? Tonight after my kids went to sleep I had to to run an errand. It took about 10 minutes, I then found myself just driving around Provo, I wanted to talk to someone, anyone, a friend, a stranger, I didn't care. I pulled into a couple restaurants, but realized that sitting alone at a table would not magically fill this need I had, and it would probably just make me more lonely. I realized I just really needed to find some equivalent to a bar - not like a crazy bar - something like "Cheers" - I actually don't even know if bars like that exist, seeing as I am not cultured in those areas - and if they do, they definitely don't exist in Provo. Well, I obviously didn't go anywhere, seeing as it is now 9:30 and instead of talking to strangers in some bar equivalent, I am blogging - is that the Mormon/housewife equivalent of a bar? Is this how I am socializing? For tonight it is. I pulled back into my apartment complex and it took all the strength I had just to get out of the car and go inside. I really, really, really miss Ashley.

What do you do when you can't stand Provo one second longer?

You leave it all behind and head to Vegas.

I needed to get way - somewhere I could drive, alone, with my two boys. Somewhere where I
could get DAILY adult (preferably) women interaction, with conversation that did not revolve around children. My sister-in-laws live in Vegas, only 5 hours south, and neither of them were currently working. I don't really know my sister-in-laws that well. Jason only has one sister, Kasey, I knew her pretty well when Jason and I were dating in high school, but since we got married she joined the peace corps and then moved to Arizona and then Vegas. I always felt like she still saw me as her younger brother's high school girl friend. My other sister-in-law, Sarah, is married to Jason's older brother, Jared. Jared wasn't there because he was deployed (he just got home a few days ago). Jared and Sarah just got married a few months ago, and I had only met her once when they were dating, and as for Jared... well lets just say he doesn't come around much. Since I have been with Jason (8 years), I have probably seen him 6 times, and in those 6 times, maybe heard him say 10 words.

Basically what I am trying to say was that I was really nervous to call them and just invite myself down with my two young boys. I really don't know where I got the guts. I dialed like 5 times, but hung up before pushing send. I think it just shows how desperate I was to get away. When I told them I wanted to come visit they said, "when?" and I was like, "umm... how about tomorrow?" hahaha...they were so sweet and so willing to accommodate us- they were so great.


I was nervous about the drive. I had about 15 binkey's in my cup holder, so I could just reach back and give Noah another one, and a bunch of pens and markers to keep handing Brock. I borrowed a DVD player from my brother, and left right at nap time. It went GREAT! The boys were awesome. We stopped only once in St. George.

We stayed at Sarah's house. She is studying to take the test to be a science teacher for next fall. So she just stayed at home and studied while Kasey went with us on all of our outings. But, like I said, I didn't go for the outings and activities, I went for the interaction and conversation... which I definitely got. We stayed up until 12 or 1 am just talking - which was hard because my kids woke up at 5 am EVERY MORNING. I felt so bad for these single/newly married women - they definitely got a good dose of birth control from my boys.

One day we went swimming

It wasn't too hot - especially for Vegas - see the nice overcast!

And on another day we went to this fun park with HUGE slides, water sprayers, and a dinosaur fossil area.

Sarah has a cat named, Kitty. Brock was fascinated with him. On the first day Brock would do anything to avoid the cat, walk all the way around the room, just so he wouldn't walk by him - but was always watching the cat, very interested in what it was doing. By the end of the week they had done a 180. Brock just wanted to be with the cat, pet him, feed him, hold him, chase him. Kitty would not come out of Sarah's room. If Brock was being quiet, Kitty would sneak out to see if he had left, then when he would see Brock he would run back into the room. Brock had NO boundaries. I didn't get the picture I wanted too - but every time Kitty would eat, Brock would lay on his stomach with his head in his hands and watch Kitty eat. Brock would be like 6 inches from Kitty's face - it was so funny.

I had the BEST time. I seriously can not over emphasize that enough. Not only was it EXACTLY what I needed, but I really got to know and love my sister-in-laws. I really feel like we are friends now and not just because we all share a last name. Being able to get together without the influence of the family or husbands, really gave us a chance to get to know each other as adults and as women. And I feel like I got to know Jared a lot better too - even though he wasn't there, just by getting to know his wife. I came home and said to Jason, "You have this really cool older brother that you don't even know."

Thanks SO MUCH Kasey and Sarah for taking us in and being SO great to us. It was such a blast.

What should go in my confession sidebar...but it was too long

For all you google reader people who don't actually ever go to my blog - I have a "confessions" gadget on my sidebar - where I divulge my deepest darkest secrets.

I really want to stop nursing... but I will continue for a few more months for several reasons. One of the reasons is for excuses. I have always wanted to eat snacks in church and take naps in the afternoon... but always too embarrassed to do so, but when you are pregnant or nursing you feel justified. Well I have been either pregnant or nursing for almost 3 years now... and I don't want to go back to no naps and no inappropriate snacking. (Maybe I should just get pregnant? :) Another reason for still nursing - I like having the boobs - but that one is more embarrassing and I should probably not admit that.

Zoo

We have already made it to the zoo twice this summer - and I intend on going several more times. I like to go at 9 am- right when it opens - you practically have the zoo to yourself and it is not hot yet. Brock loves it - he talks about it at least once a day, he talks about how he "saw elephant at zoo" or "rode train at zoo".

Brock and Noah with Payton and Brooklyn Bell

Noah is really great at the zoo - despite the above picture - it was mostly just a bad shot - he was not that sad.

On the train ride

My sister, Ashley, has Tuesdays and Thursdays off this summer - so I have tried to plan my outings accordingly so she can come. We had a great time with her at the zoo.

Payton and Brock are so cute together - they get along great when it is just the two of them - but they are a year apart, which makes a big difference at this age - so when other kids are around that are closer to Payton's age and developmental range Brock goes and plays with Brooklyn - which is great becasue they are only 6 months apart. The above picture was taken in the morning when there were no other kids from our play groups there - the below picture was taken when Payton's other friends came. Most of Karli's and mine's kids are going to be like that - we just can't seem to get on the same schedule, for example when Payton is in 6th grade, Brock will be in 5th, Brooklyn will be in 4th, Noah will be in 3rd, her new baby will be in 2nd, and my next one will be in 1st (I am not pregnant - just hypathetically) - we will probably never have kids in the same grade - strange that we are always one year off.



Noah is so cute at the zoo. I have never really used my full size stroller (I like to be a simplest) - but my sister convinced me to use it at the zoo - and now I probably use it daily. Noah just is as happy as a clown in that thing. He just lounges around eating his kix - enjoying the ride.

Sometimes he sticks both his feet up on the tray and just leans back - enjoying his sweet ride.

He had a little too much fun... he totally conked out in like two seconds.

Evenings

Sometimes when Jason gets home from work he is really tired, obviously Noah is not.

Discovery Gateway

Brock had such a fun time at the museum. He sees it on commercials now on KBYU - he comes and grabs be and says, "this place...fun...go again".

Payton is so great with babies. He loves to just sit and look at Noah - he is so soft and gentle. Noah smiles everytime he sees Payton - they have become good friends.

Don't tell the Lord what you don't want

I teach Relief Society on the third Sunday. This is the third time I have been called as a RS teacher in the the past 3 years. Every time I have taught on the second or third Sunday. For May the fourth Sunday teacher asked if I would teach it because she was going to be out of town, I said sure. (FYI - second and third Sundays are taught out of Teaching of the Prophet Joseph Smith and fourth Sundays are taught out of the Conference Ensign.)

On Sunday morning after I was finished putting together my lesson I said to Jason:

"I am really glad I don't teach fourth Sundays. They are really hard. I hope I never get asked to do fourth Sundays - I would say no. I just want to get up and read the talk. How am I supposed to expand on something that is already so inspired and so perfect. I hate teaching fourth Sundays."

When my lesson was over the First Counselor in the RS (the one in charge of teachers) came up to me and said:

"We would like you to switch to teach the fourth Sunday lesson instead of the third. A lot of sisters who have taught it before just mostly read the talk and don't expand on it that much. We think you could keep the discussion focused and expand the talk really well. Will you switch."

Of coarse I said yes. "We do not seek for callings, nor do we deny them." (Elder Neil L. Anderson)

Making life difficult

The reason for my sporadic blogging (and quality of posts) is due to our increasingly difficult circumstances with the boys. Both of them are terribly light sleepers and as such can not share a room quite yet. Jason and I are done with having Noah in our room - and plus if he wakes up in the night he can see us and gets really mad that we don't come get him, and since we only have a two-bedroom apartment, Noah now sleeps in the living room. However, Jason now is doing a new fitness routine (P90X) where he works out to DVD's after the kids go to bed. So each night we put Noah to bed in our room in the pack'n'play then move him and the pack'n'play into the living room when it is time for us to go to sleep. Then each morning I move the pack'n'play back into our bedroom so he can take his naps in there. Since he is an, aforementioned, light-sleeper I cannot be on the computer when he is in our room sleeping (that is where the computer is), so the only chances I get to blog are either too late at night or if Noah is awake and Brock is sleeping and Noah does not mind playing by himself.

We really need to get out of this place - things are going down hill quickly. I sware to you if we are here for another fourth of July "Freedom Festival" I am going to scream. I am actively looking for a house to rent in Salt Lake - I was going to wait until Jason's job got worked out and we could just move right into a house - but that could be all the way until September - and I just can not fathom waiting that long!

For those of you who don't know about Jason's job - his company got bought out and they were going to transfer the department to Omaha - but last week they backed out and decided not to transfer the department, but instead lay them off in August - yea! So we are back in the job search. So if anyone knows of a Human Resources position - let us know (or of a house we could rent in Salt Lake (or Northern Utah County)).

On an entirely separate note - I have figured out what I am missing in my life. I want to learn to be a good writer. I used to write fairly well when I was working. I wrote legal letters to government agencies, lawyers, and disgruntled customers - I became pretty good at expressing exactly what I wanted to say in a clear and concise manner; I have lost almost all of that skill since I have not used it in a few years - but now I want to get more into creative writing. I just feel like I can not adequately express my emotions with my current level of writing - I get frustrated and just decided not to write about it. I talked to Jason and we decided that I am going to take a creative writing course. I don't know where or when, I have to do some research - but I am way excited about it. I would have never done anything like this a few years ago - I would have been way too self conscious - but I feel like I have changed a lot in the last few years and am not so concerned about what other people think of me. But that is another post for another day.

Temple Square and Meagan's Wedding

My cousin got married on Saturday and had her reception at the Lion House. It was such a beautiful day and she was such a beautiful bride. She is the first cousin of mine to get married on my mom's side, I am so happy for her and Quinn. They are a great couple and we are excited for him to be apart of the family.

Since we were around Temple Square I thought we should get some pictures of the boys. Unfortunately we came on the weekend where they were tearing out the spring flowers, but have not yet planted the summer ones - everything was pretty much dirt. So it wasn't the photo event I was hoping for - but luckily the Lion House still had their garden's looking good, so I got a few good ones.

Warning - a lot of photo's of Brock coming up - he normally will NOT let me take pictures of him - but on this day he just stood there and said "cheese" without squinting his eyes - so I had to post them all.

Again

Even cooler than the previous post
http://austinlambs.blogspot.com/2009/05/if-that-wasnt-enough.html

So cool

Check out this post from my friend, Abbie's, blog. Her son is a little over 2 years old and was taught how to float/swim in the water in case he ever falls in, I clicked on the links in her post and they say they can teach a baby as young as 6 months old! This is so cool - I have never seen anything like this before.

http://austinlambs.blogspot.com/2009/05/worth-every-penny.html

Mother's Day

For Mother's Day my "adopted" older brother James and his wife, Vivian, and daughter, Emma, flew in from DC to surprise my mother. We love them and miss them dearly. We took about 400 pictures of the grandkids - and this is the best one I got.

So cute!

Brock had not had a nap all day - so he was pretty difficult - he DID NOT WANT HIS PICTURE TAKEN! This is the best "mother's day" picture I got - and Brock would not do one just with me.

But I got a good one of me and Noah.

In honor of my Mother

I think that once you are a mother you either become more critical or more amazed by your own mother. I definitely became more amazed. I have never really been critical, I always knew what a great mom I had - but it definitely took having kids to really appreciate what a gem me and my brothers and sisters had. For those of you who don't know my mom, here are some reasons why, and for those of you who do, I am sure you will all agree with my list.

• She truly made us all feel loved. My mom had 5 children (3 girls and 2 boys), and we all honestly think we are the favorite. We can kind of joke about how we all think that, but deep down we are all HONESTLY thinking, "but I really do know that I am really her favorite." We never really had sibling rivalries because she shared her attention with all of us and made us all feel like we were special. I think this is especially noteworthy when it comes to my two younger brothers. They are both VERY athletic, but both approach sports in a very different way. But yet they always supported each other in their athletics and did not compete - they are so close in age and play the same sports - so it could have been easy for them to be rivals. Now that I have two boys, I have been watching closely on how she was able to do this.


• She is always serving her family and guests. She is the best host. She never ever just sits down. She is always the last to eat because she is making sure everyone else has everything they could ever need (more water, ketchup, warm rolls, another fork, etc). This is all still true even when we are not at our house, she just has to make sure everyone is happy, My Aunt Cathy is the same way - when they both get together it seems everyone and everything is taken care of. My little cousin Ella came over to our house with another friend and told her, "aunt Michelle is the best, if you ask her to do anything she will do it." So her friend said, "Michelle will you make me cookies?" Next thing you know my mom is making cookies.


• She will do anything for her kids - yet we are all self-sufficient and independent. My mom is seriously such a mother. It will be ten o'clock at night and my brother Daniel will be on the couch watching TV and say, "I am hungry, will you pour me a bowl of cereal?" and of coarse she will. We tease her about it - but she did it for all of us, even now when I am at her house and I say I am thirsty, she is right there pouring me a glass of water. Yet, despite her wonderful nurturing, I believe we are all hard working, self-sufficient, and independent. We all know how to clean, do laundry, cook, budget, and serve others.
• She was a stay-at-home mom. This doesn't really sound like an attribute, but with my mom it is. Her and my dad sacrificed a lot for her to stay home with us. Not only was she at home with us, but she acted like it - she took her responsibility as a "homemaker" very seriously, a quality I am trying very hard to emulate. We had after school snacks freshly baked as soon as we came home, we had home cooked dinners, and she always offered to make us whatever we wanted for breakfast. Our house was not only always clean, but it was always nicely decorated with random candy dishes throughout the house.
• She is still a mom to her last child. This may seem like a silly thing, especially for one of her older kids to say - but my admiration for my mother has grown so much over the last few years as I have watched her raise her last children. She is as much a mother to them as she was to me and my sisters. Sometimes me and my sisters laugh about it because we think it is funny, we will be hanging out with her and at like 2:00 she has to leave because she wants to be home when Daniel gets home from school (Daniel is 17), we snicker and tell her he will be fine, but in all reality, I always had a mom there when I got home from school - why shouldn't he? And sometime I will be on the phone with her around 2:00 and she will be making Daniel cookies for his after school snack. I LOVE that she didn't get "burned out" with her last kids like so many other parents do. I think it is a testament to the kind of hard-working, kind, spiritual sons she is raising.
• She DEEP CLEANS her whole house every Monday. My ENTIRE life every Monday is cleaning day - not just Monday morning - but pretty much all day. Chores that some people only do once a month or a few times a year gets done every Monday at our house. When it was summer time we all had to clean all day (expect for one of us got to watch our little brothers), and during the school year we had to come home from school and clean. Now, even with most her kids gone, she still dedicates every Monday to cleaning. When I first went away to college, my first Monday away from home, I woke up and cleaned our whole dorm room - I did that every Monday. To be honest, I do not deep clean our whole apartment every Monday, but I do clean every Monday, at least something - just to keep the tradition alive - and I do plan on doing it when my kids are old enough to help. On top of Monday cleanings, she usually vacuums and sweeps several times a day and almost always has the prep dishes done before we sit down to a meal. I did get this habit from her, I just can't sit down to dinner unless all the prep dishes are already done. My mom's motto is "Snip as you sew, clean ad you go."
• She is such a good "boy's mom". This isn't to say she wasn't a good "girl's mom" - she definitely was, but now after having two boys, this is a quality I am just now seeing. She would stand outside for hours and pitch balls to my little brothers and then chase the balls down the street so she could come back and pitch them again. She is SO supportive in all of their sports, but keeps the perfect balance of not being over-bearing or pressuring them too much. She has a great relationship with them and it appears as though they can talk to her about their lives, something that is often hard for teenage boys to do.

I feel like I could go on forever, and I am sure I have missed a lot of things. But basically my point is that I have the best mom in the world. Our family is still young, but I think it is already safe to say that she raised all five of her children to be high-functioning, hard-working, kind adults who have very strong testimonies of the gospel, and who will be able to go on and raise their children to be the same. I have NO CLUE how she did it - but I pray that I will be able to emulate her in some way.

I love you mom, and am so grateful for all the things you did. It was all the little things that made our childhood so wonderful and those things are still enriching our lives today. I hope you had a happy mother's day. Thank you!

Women's Conference

So in case some of you did not know, I have the BEST husband in the whole world. He stayed home the last 2 days to watch the kids from 8:30 to 5 so I could go to Women's Conference, not only that but everyday that I came home the kids were dressed and happy, the house was clean, dinner was started, and he had stories of outings they had gone on throughout the day. It was so nice. I am so grateful for him.

For a note on women's conference - it was wonderful, as usual. However, I found myself getting really good ideas on how I could/should improve myself or my family and then when I thought about the implementation I immediately realized that I did not have the time or resources to accomplish my new goals. My whole day, it seems, is taken up by feedings, naps, activities for the boys, housework, and making dinner. After the third or fourth talk I was feeling a little depressed and hopeless. Then a scripture came to my mind:

"Wherefore, be not weary in well-doing, for ye are laying the foundation for a great work. And out of small and simple things proceedeth that which is great." D&C 64:33

One of the talks talked about, good, better and best - and I thought: "what are feedings and naps - good, better, or best? they are not really any of them. Then I thought, they are just 'well-doings', not really righteous endeavors, but they are part of taking care of my young family and are necessities in their lives, and I should not be weary by them."

There are many more things I would like to fit into my life one day (more service, building talents, etc), but right now is not the season in my life, and while naps, feedings, and playing at the park is not was I deem a 'righteous' life - I should not be weary in my 'well-doings' for I TRULY know that I am 'laying a foundation for a great work.'

Alone Again

Another big down fall of Provo (or any University town) - is that everyone is in transient mode, and everything is just temporary. My last 2 mom-building friends moved yesterday, and I am all alone! I hate it - I cry every time someone moves. I am terribly lonely and depressed - I can't even imagine what Monday will be like. I will be the only person home in our WHOLE building all day. No one to borrow an egg from, no one to talk too, no one for Brock to play with, no one to watch my kids real quick - I have dearly loved all my BYU/Provo friends that I have made and I don't want to make new ones - just to have to say good-bye at the end of another semester. It is just too hard!

Brock's Family Party

We had mine and Jason's family over for Brock's birthday. I always think I am taking pictures then when I go to upload them I realize I didn't get any of the guests - I need to be better at that!

I made our dessert sports theme - since he is basically an athlete :). I did a chocolate ice cream cake soccer ball, with cookies and cream ice cream, and white cupcake baseballs and basket balls. Brock was thrilled - he had to eat one of everything.

Most notable in this picture is Brock's stitches (click on it to see it good). Just when I had rescheduled his two year old photo shoot - we had another accident. On Friday we were at the Curren's graduation party - we had only been there 5 minutes when Brock decided to jump off the bed and smack his head on the bed post - we decided to take him into the doctors - we are sure glad we did - It cut all the way to the bone!! He had to get stitches - it was SO SAD - they had to put him into a straight-jacket to hold him down. He cried the whole time and was yelling, "momma hold you" (which means hold me) and "momma, scaries" (which just means scary). I felt so helpless - can't they knock him out for stitches??... seriously.